Wednesday, 22 February 2017

22 Things I've Learnt In 22 Years

Last year I did a post called 21 Things I Want To Achieve. I did this because I had just turned 21 and really felt like I needed to do something with my life and finally start ticking things off that I have always wanted to do. The majority of them I'm still trying to achieve but anyway, I really loved doing that post and I want to do something similar each year. This year I've decided to do 22 Things I've Learnt In 22 Years. Life hasn't been that easy over the last few years and I do think everything that has happened has made me the person I am today so I wanted to sort of reflect and go back and see what those things have taught me.

1. Life Doesn't Always Go To Plan

 When I was in school I had this plan of how my life was going to go. I was going to go to college, then to uni and I was going to qualify as a nurse or a midwife. I was going to meet a nice man, get married and have a family. I met a nice man but apart from that nothing else has worked out like I imagined. I am still thinking about what I want to do career wise and I never imagined at 22 I would be in this position, I thought I had it all worked out.

2. You Will Lose Friends

 I had quite a close group of friends towards the end of school but now I don't see them at all and some days it really does hurt that, that is the case. Things change and over time we've all changed as people and I'm not gonna lie, I probably didn't do as much as I should to keep that friendship going so I know I'm to blame for a lot of it. As you grow up you definitely lose friends just because your lives take different paths and without everyone making an effort to stay in touch, you do lose contact with them.

3. Don't Take Shit From Anyone 

There are so many people that I just don't talk to anymore because the way they've treated me in the past has really hurt me and I can't be doing with that in my life anymore. I've took so much from people before but I'm at a point now where I feel like a proper adult and really in control of my own life so if someone is just causing upset or drama then I want nothing to do with them.

4. You Will Lose People You Love

 I was probably a bit naive but I didn't lose anyone close to me until I was 17 so I never really thought anything like that would happen to me for a long time. Sometimes I still don't think I properly grieved and sort of accepted that it happened. I've lost people since and I feel the same about that, I don't think any of it has hit me yet that those people are gone. I now feel so aware that life really is short and you can lose people at anytime whereas I think before it wasn't something I ever thought about.

5. Don't Be Afraid To Stand Up For Yourself 

 Over the last few years I've really made more of a point of standing up for myself and not letting people walk all over me. So many people have done that in the past and even just last year when I was being treated shit at work, I finally said something and left because it was too much. I will now quite happily stand up for myself if any situation because for too long I haven't done that and very rarely has someone else stood up for me. 

6. Take Lots Of Pictures 

I take pictures of absolutely everything, whether that's food, something I've bought or if it's just a nice day. I love to go back through my camera roll on my phone and see photos from months ago that I had forgot about. I want to one day be able to look back at all the amazing things I did, and ate, and the people I spent time with because I might not always remember it.

7. Treat Others How They Treat You 

 If someone isn't putting an effort in with me anymore, then I just leave them to it because in the past I've tried and tried and got nothing back and it gets to a point where it's just tiring. Why would I want to be in touch with someone when it's all so onesided? Now I just let people do their own thing and if they get in touch then that's great. I'm very much about treating others how they treat you so if someone doesn't seem to care, then I won't either.

8. Don't Worry So Much 

I say this but I am a worrier and a lot of the time I stress over things that don't need stressing about but worrying really doesn't solve anything. That's what I have to tell myself most days. Worrying won't change the outcome and if somethings going to happen, then there is nothing you can do to stop it. Just try and get on with life and whatever happens, happens, deal with it when it comes. 

9. A Hot Bubble Bath Can Solve A Lot Of Problems

 There isn't much for me that can't be solved by a boiling hot bubble bath with a nice bath bomb and a book.

10. People Change

 As sad as this is, it's true and sometimes I still find it hard to accept that people that were good people a few years ago have now become almost a bit cold and someone completely different. Things happen that change people and unfortunately there is nothing we can do to stop it. Just accept they've changed and move on as hard as it is.

11. Travel As Much As You Can 

I've definitely not travelled far but over the last few years I have been to London a few times and really made an effort to explore that and now I absolutely love the place. It's so different to where I live and I'm so glad I've been there a few times now, I feel like a different person there. That's why I think it's so important to travel and go to new places, you might learn something about yourself or it might make you want to do something completely different with your life. Travelling, even if it is just from Sheffield to London, or whether that's to the other side of the world, it brings something out in you, you didn't know was there. Now there are so many places I want to go, there is so much of the world left to see.

12. Animals Are Nicer Than Humans 

They really are. I adore all sorts of animals and I truly believe dogs are kinder than most humans. They don't care what you look like, what job you have, how much you earn. It sounds so silly but I just think they all have hearts of gold and I would prefer a room full of dogs rather than a room full of people any day.

13. Find A Job You Love

 Your workplace is somewhere you spend a lot of your time so it's important when you're there your doing something you love. Things aren't always easy, some days will always be better than others but generally if your job is making you really unhappy then really think about what it is you want to do and get out of there. 

14. People Will Talk About You 

And there is nothing you can do to stop them. I hate the thought of people talking or bitching about me but trust me I know people have and I've learnt the hard way. People who have nothing good to say about you or just want to criticise deserve no place in your life. Just keep doing what your doing and try not to care too much about what other people have to say.

15. Appreciate The Small Moments

 Sometimes it's important to just appreciate the small things like a great cup of tea, or a cosy movie night in, or a new top you've bought. Life can be so hard sometimes and I tend to just think, life is shit and what am I even here for, but when I'm feeling like that I just have to think of all the amazing things I have done in my life, or I think about something small but lovely that has happened that day, even if it's just that I watched Big Brother that day and I love that show, or I had a really nice breakfast or something. Probably sounds silly but there are so many little things that happen every day that we just overlook.

16. Make Time For The Things You Love 

It's so easy to get caught up in things like work and uni but it's so important to make time for the things you love. For me, that's baking and I tend to do it once a week because it calms me down and it's just therapeutic for me. I love putting Spotify on and just spending hours baking. 

17. Save Money When You Can 

A lot of the time at the end of the month we don't have any spare money to put away but whenever we have in the past, I've always felt so proud of that. A bit of spare money in a savings account is brilliant for a month where your maybe struggling a bit more than usual, or you forgot someones birthday and you need to get a present. Just a little bit of money put aside can help in emergencies, or even just if you feel like you need a nice meal out and some time out, you've already got some aside.

18. It's Okay To Care A Lot

 There are a lot of people I care about that I know probably don't really care for me but I can't help it and I'm not ashamed to say that. There is nothing wrong with caring for people regardless of what they might have done or said in the past, it means you're a good person. Or I like to think of myself as a good person because of it. There are people who have said and done awful things but I still think about them and hope they're okay and they're happy. There will always be people I feel like that about and that's okay.

19. Love Your Body 

For a long time I have hated my body but I'm trying to change my way of thinking with it and I'm really trying to love it. You only get one body so it's important you look after it. Eating the right foods, exercising (I definitely need to do more of this) and also just not hating on it and saying horrible things about it. If I have a low day and I'm not really liking what I look like, I just try to find something I do like, even if that's just my shoes or my hair's gone okay. Just something positive. I also always think would I ever say any of these horrible things I'm feeling to my daughter about her body or her looks? No. So why should I say it to myself.

20. Learn To Cook 

When I first got together with George I didn't know how to cook at all but now I can quite proudly say I cook the majority of our meals and I love it. Cooking is such a fun thing for me and I love creating new meals and trying new things. I think it's so important to try and learn how to cook, it's better for you to eat homemade meals from scratch and for me personally it's also something I can pass onto my kids. I want them to share my love of cooking and I can't wait to pass some of my own recipes and favourites down to them.

21. Eat Cake 

 There is nothing wrong with treating yourself and who doesn't love a huge slab of cake or a bar of chocolate? I try to go for a healthy Monday - Friday but I relax a bit at weekends, what sort of life is it if you can't treat yourself.

22. Work Hard 

 If there is something you want, work hard and go for it. Whatever it is, put your all into it and you will get the rewards. It is such a good feeling at the end of the week knowing you've worked so hard or you've completed something you've been working on for ages. If you work hard you will get where you want to be.

So that 22 things I've learnt over 22 years. I loved doing this and I would love to know if any of you relate to this or if you've learnt anything else as you've grown up!

Relevant Posts - Why Being A Nurse Wasn't For Me // Why I Had To Leave My Job

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